Pray without Ceasing

Wow, what a week! I feel like I was stretched in every which way this week. All in all though, now that I am looking back, even with the hard times, it was a great week where I really saw the hand of God in my life.

This week, I think I am most grateful for prayer and its power. I love those moments of connection where I can communicate with my Heavenly Father. Even the little prayers over meals or in random moments walking around campus this week provided me necessary comfort.

I am not quite sure when I first experienced this, but I have realized that I feel closest to Him when I truly open my soul and pour out all my thoughts and feelings to Him. I counsel with Him. I cry to Him. I seek His guidance. And He responds with love every time. There are times when I go to Him like that, and all I feel is love, which provides me with the comfort and peace I need to know that everything will be alright. There are other times when I receive a short line of response in my mind that I know are not my own words, but His, and it is exactly what I need to boost me up and allow me to continue forward.

At the beginning of the year, there was a great devotional where Sister Wendy Nelson (wife of Elder Russell M. Nelson of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles) spoke about desperation, and it has been something that has stuck with me. Here are a few lines I like, "When we’re desperate to be guided by heaven, we work harder than ever to tune in to heaven. ...When we’re desperate for any gift of the Spirit, that is when we will finally pray with all the energy of heart for that gift. And the great news is that each spiritual gift we receive takes us one more step forward into our true selves." Alma 34:18 says, "Yea, cry unto him for mercy; for he is mighty to save."

I love the idea of praying with desperation. I learned a lot about that on my mission. Thinking about it now, I am reminded of so many times when I would fall on my knees and pour out everything I had to give, pleading for His help or comfort. One time that sticks out to me was one such prayer. It was after a hard day, so I went out in our living room and started saying a prayer out loud and describing everything that I felt I could not overcome, As I was knelt down crying, I had the image come to my mind of Christ in a similar kneeling position in the Garden of Gethsemane. I knew in that moment, that He was kneeling beside me, pleading for what I was pleading for, crying over what I was crying over.

This week I learned again about praying with that desperate, fervent attitude. I would start off my morning prayers, consumed by my gratitude for another day that I had been given to try to improve. I would be led to ask certain questions, always receiving answers. When I was not on my knees praying, I felt like I was drowning in uncertainty and confusion; but when I prayed, I only felt peace and comfort.

God's love is so overwhelmingly powerful. I cannot express my gratitude for my Father who guides me and loves me completely. Sometimes my soul wants to burst from the happiness that I feel when I think of it. I could go on and on, but instead, I will end with a scripture:

Therefore, fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail. Behold, I do not condemn you; go your ways and sin no more; perform with soberness the work which I have commanded you. Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not. Behold the wounds which pierced my side, and also the prints of the nails in my hands and feet; be faithful, keep my commandments, and ye shall inherit the kingdom of heaven. Amen. (D&C 6:34-37)

Power of Innocence

Following my post from last week, here is my picture for this week for my Foundations of the Restoration class:

It is of my younger cousin, Charlie, who has been diagnosed with autism. His innocence and sweet spirit astounds me. As he and I sat on the couch together this week, basking in the sun, I looked at him and how the light was perfectly on him.

It reminded me of how during the First Vision, Joseph Smith was covered in the glorious light that came from the manifestation of the Father and the Son. He was enlightened and because of that, he was able to restore the full gospel of Christ on the Earth.

While most of us will not have a vision like his, God reaches out to each of us with His light in different ways. Even in moments like this where the brilliant sun reaches out its rays, I feel that in a way, it represents God and His light reaching out to me.

I remember one time my freshman year of college after a hard day where I was sitting on my bed that faced a window. As I sat there thinking, the sun seemed to light up more brightly and fill my room with light. At the same time, my soul was filled with happiness, and I knew it was just another little sign that Heavenly Father was reaching out to me with His love.

Fortunately that light is available to everyone that seeks it! Let us all find a little part of it this next week.

The Light of the Restoration

This semester in my Foundations of the Restoration religion class, we were asked to choose a semester long project that would help us apply the Restoration of the Gospel to ourselves. This Restoration was completed through Joseph Smith, a prophet led by God to restore His truths on the Earth. It all started when he had a question about what path he should follow and he asked God about it. I decided for my project that I wanted to try to express my feelings of the Restoration by taking pictures of things that represent my testimony.

Here is the first picture:

To me, the first thing that came to my mind when thinking about the Restoration was light. The Restoration brings light to my life and provides enlightenment for my understanding.

Not only does the Restoration bring light to my life, but it brought and still brings light to the rest of the world. Joseph Smith found himself in darkness and confusion as to which church was the right one, but upon finding out that none of them were and that he would be called to restore the true church like the one Christ established, the Earth would never again be the same. Light was restored, and it never will be removed from the Earth again.

When I saw this sunset, I sat in my car for a few minutes admiring it and its beauty. I find myself doing the same with the Restoration (or the gospel in general); I catch myself in small moments contemplating the purpose that the gospel brings to my life and wondering what it would be like if I did not have it. The gospel defines me and has shaped me, but most of the time, I do not consciously recognize and appreciate its beautiful influence on me. However, I always appreciate when those small moments come and I am reminded with all I have been blessed with and how I have been guided in my life.

God lives. He wants to guide us, and has provided us many ways to find light in our lives. Like the light at the end of the tunnel, He guides us through the darkness, taking our hand and walking with us step by step, until we find the light. And I think that is a process that happens multiple times in our lives when we have to rediscover the light. At least that is what has happened in my life, and I am grateful for each and every time.